Omar E. Zapata | THE RIDER
As a teenager, I always had this lingering question about who I am and, more specifically, how I identify myself. Am I Hispanic? Am I Latino? Am I Mexican? Am I American?
One random childhood memory that I have with my dad is him telling me, โMijo tienes piel morena porque tienes sangre Azteca en ti.โ
I would remember this moment later on in my teenage years and would always dwell on if I did have some indigenous blood flowing through me, what does that make me?
As I grew up, my consciousness opened up to the realities of my life and how my brown skin and socioeconomic status influenced me so much.
Attending school in the Sharyland Independent School District influenced how I thought about myself and my community, especially since the Sharyland area is known for being rich and me growing up in a low socioeconomic area of the district.
Taking Advanced Placement (AP) courses in high school, I was usually the only brown student and person from my neighborhood in those classes. I would often find myself in situations where I would have to pick between being myself and assimilating to something Iโm not. In a way, I would have to act like someone else in those classes, I would have to act white. I wish I could go back and tell my younger self to forget about what those other students thought of me and of where I come from.
Another thing in my life that contributed to me questioning who I am, is how I will never truly be accepted as Mexican to people who live and are from Mexico. I will always be American or gringo to them.
Both of my parents are from Reynosa, Tamaulipas, Mexico, and immigrated to the Rio Grande Valley for a better future for my family. Even with that, there are major cultural differences between people like me in the RGV and people from Mexico. The Spanish we speak here, the traditions we celebrate and various other things are things that set us apart.
An example of what I mean is best said by Edward James Olmos as the father in the movie โSelenaโ: โWe have to be more American than the Americans and more Mexican than the Mexicans. Itโs twice as exhausting!โ
This confusion would continue into college, but it all changed when I took my first Mexican American history class at UTRGV. Before that class, I had never taken or learned about history through a Mexican American viewpoint. Yeah, I knew about Cesar Chavez, but the AP history classes that I took in high school were taught through an Anglo perspective and no Mexican American courses were ever offered during the four years I was there. I was blinded from a whole area of my own history.
Learning about the Chicano Movement, labor strikes and local history opened my eyes to a whole world that I had not known. Reading and researching all these topics and issues under this new perspective really inspired me.
A Chicano/a is someone who is of Mexican descent and born in or lives in the United States. The term Chicano first was used to insult Mexican Americans in the 1940s and 1950s. In the 1960s, however, brown people all across the country reclaimed the term, rejected assimilation into Anglo culture and turned it into a political movement.
All of this would shape my ideas and morals about various issues that we face today in our society.
With all this new knowledge and experience, I started thinking to myself how I donโt have to try to be more American or more Mexican to prove myself to anyone. That is when I started proudly and confidently identifying myself as Chicano.
By saying I am Chicano, I acknowledge the history and sacrifices that people had to make for me to even be in this position. That is why I take a lot of pride in identifying as Chicano and being from the Valley.
So, when people talk down on the Valley or its people, Iโm always quick to defend it. This region is full of talented, smart and innovative people and has a ton of history that we could learn from. It also has many issues but that is why I encourage people to get educated on these issues, so we can continue making the Valley a better home for future generations. ยกLa Lucha Sigue!
