Alejandra Yañez | THE RIDER
A UTRGV clinical therapist suggests taking a “COVID-friendly” approach to Valentine’s Day celebrations this year.
“I love Valentine’s Day,” said Maria Alejandra Mazariegos, a UTRGV clinical therapist. “I always have. Ever since being a small child, I thought it was such a neat concept–just like, a day where people openly celebrate love.”
Mazariegos said the expectations for Valentine’s Day can be stressful for some people due to the holiday being commercialized.
“I do think it’s gotten really commercial and sometimes there’s a lot of pressure, especially for people who may not know how to express themselves,” she said. “It can feel kind of awkward.”
Asked how this Valentine’s Day will differ from the rest due to the pandemic, Mazariegos replied that she hopes people don’t crowd at restaurants like they usually do.
“It’ll definitely be different in that, for sure,” she said. “We’re not gonna see the big commerciallike lines out of restaurants that kind of stuff.”
The clinical therapist said due to the pandemic, there are more single people this year than people in a relationship.
“The dating scene from 2020 has been a little bit hard because of the pandemic, so it’ll be interesting I think,” Marzariegos said. “So, how I would like to see it be different is, really, that people tune into self-love.”
She said Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to channel self-love and be your own date, regardless of whether you are in a relationship or not.
“I really think Valentine’s Day, when you’re filled with self-love and you’re filled with gratitude, you’re able to find love in every single way,” Mazariegos said. “You don’t need a valentine or a valentine’s date to show that or prove that to yourself.”
For those who do plan to spend the special day with their significant other, Mazariegos encourages couples to take a “COVID-friendly” approach and use that time to get to know each other better at home.
“I definitely think that safety is important, and if you are in a relationship and both partners have been safe, and you guys are already hanging out with each other anyways, then I think it’s important to continue to be safe and not feel pressured by stereotypes and society that you have to pretend like we’re not in a pandemic and you have to do the whole production of, like, ‘Let me take you out,’ that kind of thing, and instead get creative and find a COVID-friendly approach,” she said.
The clinical therapist suggests cooking a meal with your partner, picking up food curbside or watching a movie at home.
“But really, I think it’d be cool to use this opportunity to cook together,” Mazariegos said. “Find a cool recipe, get your ingredients, make it a whole-day activity where you can cook your meal, cook a dessert and get to know each other as you are cooking.”
For couples who have been together for a long time, she suggests a technique known as “love mapping,” to help stay in tune with your partner.
“The idea is that, as you get to know someone, you stop asking as many questions as you did when you first started dating them,” Mazariegos said. “You kind of stop that curiosity and stop asking those questions because you assume that you already know everything that you need to know about your partner. However, that’s not true. So, love mapping is really being a tourist in your partner’s world and asking questions to update that database you have of them.”
Asked what she suggests for people celebrating alone, she replied love mapping with yourself and asking yourself questions to prioritize what is most important to you.
“Same thing applies,” Mazariegos said. “Ask yourself, what do you need: Maybe it’s sleep, maybe it’s therapy, maybe it’s exercise.”
The clinical therapist suggests treating yourself by getting your favorite food, watching a movie or doing something you enjoy.
“If you can love yourself and someone else, why not do both,” Mazariegos said.
Asked what constitutes as safe and unsafe this year in terms of celebrating, she replied, “It’s important to see what the [Centers for Disease Control and Prevention] says and continue to be healthy because, hey, guess what? There will still be Valentine’s Day next year.”
